So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize