he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
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