What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
