Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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