i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
you will always have a special place in my vag
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
