she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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