If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
