OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
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