i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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