She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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