if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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