I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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