there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
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