Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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