youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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