Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
