I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
It's shark week go big or go home
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize