K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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