Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Randomize
