we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
FUCK WHALES
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
