I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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