I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
