pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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