Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
