Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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