dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
