You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
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