i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize