He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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