Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize