haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
