Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
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Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
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Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I have already put on my inside pants.