Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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