So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
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I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
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We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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