3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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