Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
