have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
