I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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