Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Pooping to opera.
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