You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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