literally had 100 drinks last night.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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