Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
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