Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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