Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
