your parents love me but you hate me
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
You can't just leave with hair like that
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize
