White coat. Heels.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Here’s Why Hotel Photos On Travel Websites Are A Complete Hoax
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.