The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
