Texts From Last Night

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  (818): View more from California

  I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.

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  (818): I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning. http://tfl.nu/ecmy
  Replies (23) Good night (3127) Bad night (829) Order T-Shirt
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  (239): View more from Florida

  i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass

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  (239): i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass http://tfl.nu/a9ff
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  (626): View more from California

  im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.

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  (626): im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again. http://tfl.nu/ai0s
  Replies (6) Good night (953) Bad night (2093) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.

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  (916): The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood. http://tfl.nu/ro5l
  Replies (9) Good night (5019) Bad night (1267) Order T-Shirt
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.

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  (859): I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana. http://tfl.nu/vvio
  Replies (42) Good night (1151) Bad night (3316) Order T-Shirt
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.

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  (419): You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you. http://tfl.nu/qq0g
  Replies (15) Good night (2371) Bad night (1121) Order T-Shirt
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace

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  (803): and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace http://tfl.nu/njta
  Replies (7) Good night (2588) Bad night (610) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.

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  (313): He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings. http://tfl.nu/w72z
  Replies (5) Good night (2096) Bad night (730)
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  (806): View more from Texas

  I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza

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  (806): I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza http://tfl.nu/jih1
  Replies (3) Good night (1370) Bad night (649) Order T-Shirt
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Elaborate

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Strip Mario-Kart

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  (224): My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream. (312): Elaborate (224): Strip Mario-Kart http://tfl.nu/xw36
  Replies (11) Good night (2508) Bad night (529)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.

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  (304): Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low. http://tfl.nu/whd6
  Replies (6) Good night (705) Bad night (570) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.

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  (404): Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire. http://tfl.nu/nkea
  Replies (3) Good night (889) Bad night (325) Order T-Shirt
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.

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  (620): I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender. http://tfl.nu/s55r
  Replies (5) Good night (1328) Bad night (228) Order T-Shirt
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.

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  (541): 25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that. http://tfl.nu/kj3r
  Replies (12) Good night (450) Bad night (695) Order T-Shirt
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  (857): View more from Massachusetts

  His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.

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  (857): His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time. http://tfl.nu/a23u
  Replies (3) Good night (540) Bad night (146)

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