I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
