I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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